0:00
[Music] we we uh maybe we should just record uh

0:07
a segment after this that says when you listen to this podcast please go to and take this but either way you get the

0:14
idea yeah it's been fun say that right now said it who listens to a podcast

0:20
from the back Oh you mean stick it at the front

0:25
yeah all right I'm not saying we have to but say it right now and I'll I'll put it at the

0:31
front podcast listeners please take a moment to go to the Mike

0:37
Fosters seven seven Primal questions assessment assessment and then listen to

0:42
the rest of the podcast you you'll than us if you do that in that order you can go to

0:49
primal.com uh yeah that's probably the best place to go yeah nice job I'm going to put that at the front and I'm also

0:55
going to leave it at the end so everyone can that's right that's fair enough they'll know they'll know I wasn't very for thinking on that part that's right

1:02
but at the beginning they like wow they were very forward

1:08
[Music]

1:13
thinking welcome to how I see it with me Mark Pratt and Justin Sternberg this is

1:20
a podcast that works to countercultural polarization through thoughtful

1:26
conversations [Music]

1:32
live red red lights on red lights on yep Segways Segways to come although I'm a

1:39
little reluctant on Segways I I bombed last one but like that's a good segue into segue

1:47
though there you go sometimes you win sometimes you lose good morning Justin good morning Mark

1:53
how are you I am very well it's very cold this morning it is cold this morning yeah yeah did your truck start

1:59
okay oh yeah started up just fine Old Faithful Old Faithful just you know did you get the frost out the window it

2:05
really wasn't Frosty I I was surprised it was just so clear I think you know it just got cold and clear and it was bow

2:13
well for the the old plants in the sense that Frost is the killer right

2:18
necessarily cold is that correct I that's what I've heard yeah I suppose at some point I suppose yeah I mean like

2:24
you say that Frost expands the cells in the in the leaves so I imagine there a

2:30
point where cold just does the same thing MH without the frost but either way yeah when it's cold it's cold yes

2:37
and it's cold uh so we're going to talk about some questions there your Segway

2:43
there's my segue well I was thinking about that in the process because we were talking a little bit about you know

2:48
things that kind of uh just you know push you the wrong way make you scramble

2:54
make you scramble yeah you're not exactly sure but all of a sudden it's like you know like for some people it

3:00
might be negotiating or haggling over a car or you know over a a number for

3:06
other people it would be a look that they might receive from someone you know

3:12
and or the idea someone's coming to your house sure or uh yeah the aspect of is

3:20
what I do matter MH you know is do people you know so under or uncertainty

3:28
at work you know like so that can cause people to scramble when they're not quite sure what the future holds or sure

3:34
yeah there's all kinds of scramblers yeah right yep there's all kinds of scramblers and the reality of it is

3:40
there's nothing new Under the Sun that's true you know so today as part of our uh

3:48
our podcast this morning we have uh this uh you have a guest on yeah well

3:54
indirectly Mike Foster Mike Foster yes has he doesn't know he's

4:00
exactly he's been on Fox News he's been on Good Morning America he won't be concerned about how I see how I see it

4:07
exactly it's going to go right on the homepage logos you know they got all featured on how I see

4:14
it but Mike Foster came up with seven Primal questions and this is a

4:20
assessment that you know we can put in our podcast and we'll have a link at the end and it was just an interesting disc

4:27
it was actually information that Lizzy shared with us over the weekend while she was home so I just thought it was

4:32
kind of a a neat little opportunity cuz I think you know so often in uh in this

4:39
process and like I say we've shared you know love Styles and those kind of

4:45
things but I think you know through this process of development you know we have

4:52
and I and I see it so much with I just uh it was reminding me I was working with a couple last night even and you

4:59
know and the uh the wife basically said to me she said he grew up exactly the same way I

5:06
did you know his parents were separated you know he lived you know alone and and

5:13
it's like in my own mind I could hear what she was saying and understood where

5:19
she was coming from on a you know a bigger a you know a macro level but yet

5:25
that that has a completely different effect on us as individuals you know she's she's female he's male

5:33
you know her mom was a different than his mom you know to where they're just completely different people who grew up

5:40
in a similar circumstance yeah you know I feel like I've learned that so significantly at CR going through step

5:48
study groups with multiple times over the years and even open shair groups is an opportunity to hear other people talk

5:55
about their struggles sure and as a result of talking about their struggles there's also a lot of talking about

6:00
contextual things like well I grew up this way and so sometimes I really have a hard time with ex right yep and a lot

6:06
of times it's like there's so many times I've heard that kind of thing where like wait they had what I had and but they

6:12
struggle with that and I don't that's weird or vice versa they had everything I wanted and everything I'm feel like

6:20
that holds me back and I didn't have that I didn't have they kind of describe this ideal scenario where they had that

6:26
and then they ended up having these problems so I've had a lot of kind of eye openening opportunities to so it's

6:34
like you said yeah the the macro Vision you might look similar but we're all so

6:41
distinct exactly Butterfly Effect really has an impact when comes to every

6:46
individual if if you know what I mean by the butterfly effect sure yeah one one significant I mean one small change

6:54
between your life and mine and everything else being equal we could be completely opposite ends of the Spectrum

7:00
right yeah yeah yeah so yeah I just thought that was interesting as as you

7:05
know we were going through this and I was able to take this assessment and now of course will be in the link but I was

7:11
just thinking about it as far as you know how we develop and what these things mean to us because as I and for

7:18
me kind of that underlying part you know is okay

7:24
what do we do you know in a when you use the word scramble yeah you know stole

7:29
his word that's that's Mike's word yeah that's Mike's word Mike but in that

7:35
process it's the things that you know I tend to feel tend tend to make me

7:41
scramble yeah those those Mo those times when something doesn't seem sufficient

7:48
something isn't right and then I find myself from my perspective reacting in

7:54
some ways versus responding MH and I think you know little things like this you know little assessments to you know

8:01
just kind of help us create a little more self-awareness you know and also the

8:06
aspect because I think as we become more self-aware we also gain others awareness it's like oh your style your language

8:15
you are different than I am so therefore it's not about me knowing what you're

8:22
doing I actually have to ask the questions yeah what is it about that

8:28
what happened then how did you feel you know because I guarant what what what

8:33
you I can see the gears turning there well okay so you just made me think about the fact that so many of

8:40
these quiz makers and assessment makers sure I just it just my mind was like

8:47
wait a second I just thought of something they see the value of the whole system they they created it right

8:53
so sure there is so much value in what you just said not only do I know what I

8:58
am I also understand the so his is seven questions right so I understand my Primal question but I also understand

9:05
the other six so I can look across the table and think oh question five question two and it gives me that

9:11
empathy and the ability to go yes different than me and grew up in the same situation but somehow they're two

9:16
and I'm still a seven or whatever and that's an incredible thing sure I just

9:22
realized like a lot of these things they don't give you that out of the box they give you you sure right

9:30
yes exactly no I'm not I'm not criticizing uh and the reason why uh that's so Eureka for me is because um at

9:38
our work we did the we do the enag basically everyone who comes on does the inogram it kind of helps with management

9:43
that kind of thing but when we first decided to do this we brought in this anagram like

9:50
coach Guru Guru yes exactly and joke about it what all you want but it was

9:57
amazing to hear her talk about every every type and kind of how people can interact and all that and it gave me a

10:03
tool set that I wouldn't have had otherwise just to know well I'm this I don't know what your problem is well

10:08
you're you're other you're a that number and I'm this number so you're an other so clearly you're not quite right but

10:15
that's okay we'll figure it out I I am the optimal number exactly exactly

10:21
that's what I heard when I heard my assessment no I think that's a good

10:26
point though that coming from a therapeutic perspective which you do and are you look at this and you go wow this

10:33
is a good thing to help others understand others and themselves I just don't know how often that's happening

10:40
when the whole system is bent towards learn more about you no I hear you just

10:45
I don't know yeah and and I think that's that's what under from my perspective that's what's underlying and that's a

10:51
big part of how we love you know that aspect of self and others awareness that's the like a second stage of three

10:58
stag okay and then and then of course the well the third stage is rupture and

11:05
repair because in reality we all enter into conflict your number isn't the same

11:11
as my number so I'm going to look at something I'm going to experience something and I'm going to have a

11:17
completely different Viewpoint perspective of it yeah and so when I do

11:22
that I'm going to my you know my brain is going to kind of click click click click click you know what do you spread

11:29
sheet this thing and there's your answer spit it out at the end this is how I need to respond and it's like no

11:36
somebody else's computer went through brain went through and their spreadsheet came out this is the response right well

11:43
both responses make perfect sense based on that number yeah exactly you know

11:49
what's crazy about that too is you can take two people of the same number sure and put in the same input and still have

11:56
different output and the reason is all the variables that you know go into that spreadsheet are different you have

12:04
different parents grew up in a different state maybe you're a different level in the uh soci economics yeah or like

12:11
you're the youngest child the oldest child like just a bajillion variables that we kind of just don't even consider

12:18
when we look at each other you know so I could be you know question seven you could be question seven and you can give

12:23
us the same question and we come up with vastly different answers because there are so many variables we're not even

12:28
consider you know no doubt yeah so you know cuz we always talk about well they're different there and that's why

12:34
well oh sure I'm pretty sure if you had married a clone you'd still fight with them ex oh no doubt yeah yeah no doubt

12:42
yeah cuz the other thing is I'm a variable in your situation right so even if we're clones what I do causes you to

12:50
do something different or think differently or be irritated or whatever like yeah um anyway and and I think to

12:57
to kind of you know further your example I think you know so often I in in

13:03
sibling relationships yeah you know it's like well we grew up in the same home

13:09
yeah how can we be so different it's like no you didn't grow up in the same home you know you didn't you grew up in

13:15
the same house right but that home dramatically changed when you know this

13:22
7B to 8 ounce child came in that home I mean you know that home changed that

13:28
family system changed when this other individual came along so it's you know

13:34
the home I grew up in had you in it exactly and vice versa yeah yes yeah

13:41
based on that birth order type stuff so it automatically changes but so yeah

13:46
that's where and then you know that third level rupture and repair we're going to come into conflict but that

13:52
ability to say okay how do we resolve this you know how do we because and I

14:00
think so often that's what happens is we don't necessarily get to a point where we can you know hear the other person

14:07
like we'd like to or we're not heard in such a way that says okay I've never

14:14
experienced the ability to have repair I've I've only grown up in this rupture

14:21
to where once I can understand what a repair looks like then I'm better able to recognize okay this is a cycle and a

14:28
pattern that happen all the well go ahead and like you said once I experience a repair now I go oh

14:35
this can be repaired exactly right yes because I'm able to kind of relax into

14:41
you know that conflict and I don't have to necessarily say oh my goodness conflict is terrible yeah because

14:47
there's no way to to resolve it and don't you yeah yeah I was going to say don't you think conflict is so terrible

14:53
because it's represents something irreparable yes right like that's most often the thing that that causes the the

15:00
Schism at least I can say my experience the way I feel when there's conflict it's like well this is always going to

15:06
be this way and you know that's that's where yeah I I'll I'll say recently

15:14
I'm yeah I've worked on that been able yeah I've had those feelings come in

15:20
where it's like this is never going to change whatever oh sure and said n and then just just like tried to go just

15:27
chill out don't listen to that okay you know what I mean and that that man it really changed how I dealt with the situ

15:34
you know how I responded and doesn't mean it was perfect what but it definitely that's good self-awareness yeah well I just say that

15:41
I don't always have that self- awareness but it was really refreshing to be able to see those thoughts coming and go nope

15:47
you stay over there sure you know cuz that's uh I'll say like that's one thing

15:53
with depression uhhuh that's exactly where I was thinking yeah is I don't get to CH I I can see come in I can't block

16:00
them it's like they they like go through can't block them they like go through my hands it feels like if that makes sense

16:07
yes I see them coming I it's like I can't but you just you just demonstrated

16:13
that you can choose some yes yes I guess that's kind not that you can't block

16:18
them but yet you're learning how to focus on certain ones and tending to

16:26
ignore the other ones so therefore you can choose we'll see about that you're

16:33
growing in your ability to block some of them yeah yeah yeah and hopefully hope

16:40
it wasn't a fluke well no but you're but that's the reality you're building some success with that yeah and therefore

16:48
that promotes your desire to do that again yeah are you going to do it perfectly every time likely not but even

16:56
when I failed to you still have that success to look back on and say well I

17:02
didn't do it right this time but I know it works so I'm going to you know try harder next time you're you're a good

17:08
football fan at that point there's always next season that's right that's

17:13
right but yeah poor Cowboys fans and was the team ATB Steelers yeah yeah but yeah

17:21
that's what it comes down because I talked with a you know Pittsburgh Steeler fan you know you're up from that area so he was funny he's like well we

17:28
did better than I thought we'd do you know it's like that's the other side of the coin you know that's what we do well

17:34
we didn't suck like we usually do but yeah yeah but yeah so that being said if

17:41
we uh I just kind of wanted to uh kind of go through that in such a way and and we'll kind of label them out a little

17:48
bit we invite people to kind of just if you have a moment take the assessment

17:54
like I say there's no um I was able to get mine even without putting in them um yeah that's pretty R you say skip the

18:01
email that was well here's the thing I was like I like this enough I would give you my

18:07
email but also had a required feel for phone I'm like okay I'm out I'll I'll do

18:13
the skip so if you're listening Mr Foster maybe don't make all of it required because some people might be

18:19
willing to give their phone not their email whatever that's yeah anyway uh real that's how we see it Mr Foster that

18:25
is how I see it anyway yeah um but yeah so there's no subscription

18:31
there's no and like you say you're given all the information and that may change in the next you know depending on how

18:37
many listeners we send you know that might that might CH a check yeah no um I was going to say too right

18:44
before we dive into them um this just like every other assessment is a distilling right of kind of so I like

18:51
what you were saying you said nothing's new Under the Sun right so what's cool about that is after eons of us being the

18:57
same kind ways as Humanity we're able to look at it and review it and go and

19:04
distill to some some key components of what makes us tick so I like I really like this but as with everything nothing

19:11
can fully Encompass an in individual and I thought it was funny when you sent me this because I know you've pushed back

19:17
on personality test before because it's like right we've discussed that where you don't like the idea that it can sum

19:23
you up in one I hear you I well I dislike taking tests like this but I

19:28
give him credit cuz he gave me the little sliding scale oh you follow me

19:35
what I don't like is when somebody asks me a the point blank question and it's

19:41
only yes or no I it would probably still equated to yes and no you know in the in

19:47
the in the the drop down but I was able to just slide it a little bit to you

19:53
know partially agree that's a good point if you're one of those that doesn't like to be pegged then so you know you can

19:59
slide that slider anywhere between the Continuum it's a Continuum rightly yeah and it'll and it gave me the you know

20:07
perception that I was able to put myself on that Continuum where you where I

20:13
desire to be that's a good point that's a good point but yeah so anyway standard disclaimer it is a distilling so like if

20:20
you know maybe not be a th% perfect Peg you in every sense but and and recognizing pull them back you know we

20:27
are accepted our identity our security and all that purpose which this stuff deals with ultimately I believe comes

20:34
from God you know unconditional acceptance you know but but there again growing in self-awareness helps me you

20:42
know interact with other people in a way that I believe is helpful but you know

20:48
well and bringing it back to God too like all of these Primal questions are all only answered through God sure

20:57
properly right you can find answers for all of these in you know other places

21:02
but ultimately they're all going to end up empty or you know and I think what happens is you

21:09
know we all grow up with imperfect parents not blaming anyone but you know

21:15
some of these questions just don't get answered sufficiently yeah you know in our in our you know childhood background

21:22
you know imperfect people you know raising imperfect kids you know that kind of thing and you know it creates a

21:29
hunger or a yes a craving maybe the better exactly so there is that that

21:36
need and you know even as we were talking about it with Lizzy that you know she was describing it far better

21:42
than I probably will you know in this just this moment but you know it was to the point of it's like okay yeah we're

21:49
talking about attachment we're talking about needs going unmet and how that need translates into this Primal

21:55
question or you know so yeah that's where I'm at so cool well um for the

22:02
sake of the seven questions I think what we'll do is we'll uh kind of go through and and label out the seven questions

22:07
and come back sounds and then actually kind of go piece by piece and we'll talk about them accordingly how's that sound

22:13
that sounds great all right so we have Mike weigh in a little bit too yeah yeah I'll let you weigh in for

22:20
Mike but long story short question one is am I safe question two is am I secure

22:28
question three am I loved question four am I wanted question five am I

22:36
successful question six am I good enough and question seven do I have a purpose

22:44
nice now everyone pause the podcast and guess which one you think Mark and I are

22:50
oh all right you're back did you get it right all right you uh you uh you I I

22:58
thought this was interesting when we both took the assessment we actually agreed yeah yeah on the same Primal

23:05
question on the same Primal question and it kind of It kind of I think as people listen you know you could hear yeah some

23:13
of that in our discussions you know especially when we think about you know goals and you know Legacy those those

23:22
kind of things you know as we talk about that we we were both question seven do I

23:27
have Purp purp yeah and so like you say it was just kind of interesting and so I I wasn't surprised by that and and even

23:35
as you know Lizzy was you know discussing the questions it's like it it was because question seven of course is

23:42
the last one so in that process it's like H this isn't this isn't much this is all

23:48
stupid this guy's totally missing it last question

23:53
exactly I'm glad you like this Lizzy but you know this means nothing to me until it's like she started you know going to

24:00
the purpose it's like oh wait wait hold on hold on this is making yeah this is a lot more important than I thought it

24:08
was so funny but yeah so that was just the the timing of it yeah awesome and

24:15
and I think you know and and we we've have we've talked about any of grams before I know we've talked about we

24:20
didn't do it we did did we do an actual podcast no no no okay it might not be a bad idea well either either way those PE

24:28
you know people who are aware people who listen who had know their anagram this is going

24:34
to seem kind of it's going to have that nothing new Under the Sun type feel to

24:40
it you're going to be able to pull some of that in and even the question one um

24:45
you know where any gram one is perfection yeah perfectionist I think you know it's like am I safe uh question

24:52
ones are the world's Guardians they help people feel safe and protected and

24:57
naturally are naturally able to analyze and predict and tend to be tend to be

25:03
emotionally connected and sensitive at their core they have a physical and

25:08
emotional safety and negative surprises are no thanks are a no thanks question

25:15
ones are at their best when they're relaxed at peace and can heal and

25:20
protect those around them however when they're in the scramble there you go there's the scramble they tend to try

25:26
and control the future live on high alert and exist in a lot of stress and

25:32
anxiety yeah it's interesting cuz you you translate that as a one kind of any

25:37
G one or you see the connection right um I I see some of the any gam one stuff in

25:43
question five but also that also is question three sure or I mean excuse me

25:49
anyr three so anyr one is kind of this perfectionist idea right and Y um what

25:56
else is it about the anyr do you remember Perfection I Chris is an anagram one so like very precise yep you

26:05
know per matter Details Matter yeah and kind of expects others to hold to that

26:10
standard as well right that's kind of I think any G one and that's what and that's what reminded me you know it's

26:16
like they they are kind of those Guardians it's like if I'm if I'm bringing something to your attention

26:23
that you know isn't necessarily right that's to prot you it's not that I'm

26:30
wanting to you know let you know that I noticed your mistake it's to protect you

26:35
from that failure that you might and it and and it may not matter to the other person you know or so it's just it's and

26:43
then you know being able to I think it's you know we can definitely see where at times that ability to if everything is

26:51
good relaxed and nurturing and all that but when that when it's on high

26:57
alert it is a desire to protect and provide safety for other people yeah you

27:03
know that's that's the part you know that kind of connected with me and the anr one uh that's totally fair and I'll

27:11
just say that's how you see it Mark no what as I'm reading these I'm I

27:16
just I can see one in a lot of these and then vice versa like some of the other ones which

27:24
makes me think like we're looking at a different angle at the same oh sure facets that's how yeah right that's how

27:30
I see it it's basically like again the anigram is not a fully encompassing view

27:36
of a person and neither is any other you know the how how we love quiz whatever they're all like you said facets or

27:43
directions at looking at the same person and so I feel like you can still fit one of these

27:50
really tightly and still be this other inag thing and still see some of the inogram stuff in the other it's like

27:56
doubt does that make sense that's what once you get all these personality tests then you can really see yeah even more

28:03
who you are and how it's nuanced oh sure does that make sense oh yeah yeah there's no doubt there's nuances and I

28:09
think it's interesting as we as we would read through these yeah likely you know

28:15
you might lock on one person right that tends to remind

28:20
you this this question says oh that that others awareness is kicking in at that

28:25
point cuz and then and here again this is isn't a judgmental statement but having that awareness that says oh okay

28:34
that might be why you know what makes someone tick which can give you the tools for relating you know relational

28:41
tools to yeah yeah to understand yeah yeah because I'm I'm in agreement with

28:46
you you know it's like when we think of you know Perfection it might come back to even for you know and I think there's

28:53
going to be it's going to be nuanced between male and female even to a certain degree you know yeah Perfection

29:00
for a male Perfection for a female is it Perfection for a male might be driven by

29:05
success being at the top where a woman might be about is is am I serving right

29:11
or for a female it might you know I'm thinking about honor and respect for guys as far as successful you know but

29:18
security is going to be bigger or you know safety you know possibly for that

29:23
female design you know that kind of Al we know that's not the same for every like yeah all women need security all

29:29
men need success but yeah but being able to you know yeah make it fit to a to a

29:37
greater degree everybody's going to be different but yeah there are going to be some likenesses in that male side of

29:45
things would you like to read the second one yeah let me add it question number two am I secure so you talked about am I

29:51
safe so there it' be interesting to talk about the distinctions between these two your thoughts but uh this one is the

29:59
q2's question to people q2's are great providers and partners and they build

30:04
stable environments prioritize their relationships and finances and tend to be trustworthy grounded and methodical

30:12
at their core they crave security and not having the right amount of money or relational resources to protect

30:18
themselves is a big fear when q2's are at their best they're generous connected

30:23
and secure however when they're in their scramble they tend to fret over money re resources and relational Capital which

30:30
that's an interesting phrase relational Capital yeah and and when you read that

30:37
you know I think that's a it does delineate the difference well between

30:42
safe question one which is safe question two which is secure CU why yeah tease it out exact

30:50
well I think so much of you know question one it is about the emotional connection and that the feeling if you

30:57
will of am I safe I think the secure is

31:03
looking at this this this and this so that number in the bank account you know

31:09
the these factors I I I guess I saw it as a little bit more uh

31:16
defined you know I I look at that I look at that and I look at that and it's like

31:21
nope I'm not secure MH that you know my bank account needs to go up $5,000 more

31:26
do and then we'll be good mhm whereas I think the safe seems a little more

31:34
emotional you know um I was I was trying I was thinking of um what's the

31:40
enf um yeah yeah that's another Personality yeah you know where there was a entf and I J yeah exactly one is

31:49
sensing or yeah you understand where I'm coming intive sing yeah yeah that's that's kind

31:57
of that difference to me yeah you know that sayfe felt a little more intuitive

32:02
like it's a it's a nebulous thing that I am just I just have to feel it I can't explain it it's just a feeling that I

32:09
have but the secure you know it's trustworthy grounded look it's kind of

32:14
almost like looking at the things I do disciplines matter yeah is what what

32:20
comes to mind for I can produce security by having X Y and Z where safe is more

32:26
about yeah a feeling and yeah I can see what you're saying how yeah how do you

32:31
how does a question one am I safe go about achieving safety I guess that's

32:38
the scramble they try to control future live on high alert exist a lot of stress and anxiety but that's not yeah that's

32:45
yeah I can see what you're saying as far as yeah it almost feels like there's a

32:50
less ability to address the problem as from a safety person that's that's my take on

32:57
it as a little more nebulous I it's like I

33:02
can't necessarily put my finger on just one thing it's this combination know I

33:07
need this exactly exactly which is which is a great awareness yeah if I know what

33:14
I need and I'm able to communicate that right yeah you know because then other

33:19
so because one may come down to as simple as I need a hug yeah you follow

33:25
me at this moment whereas whereas two it's like well we're spending a little too much from my perspective you know

33:33
and we need to be saving a little more that kind of thing and I and I think in some ways it was funny as I read too

33:38
it's like there was a part of me that could identify with the first part but it's like the the second part of um not

33:47
having the right amount of money you know right amount of money or relational that part didn't bother me at all yeah

33:53
yeah you know it's like I don't have a a specific number yeah you know it's like

33:59
it's good enough both one and two kind of remind me of Megan uh in a lot of

34:05
ways I mean the world's Guardian she's that's kind of how she operates okay to

34:10
a degree and then also the question too is uh build stable environments you know

34:15
prioritize their relationships and finances and to be trustworthy grounded methodical yeah like she's very much

34:21
those things um but then it's like you know and that's what you're going to find with these things is like half of

34:27
the thing will Nail Someone the other half you're like I don't know like um the relational resources like she's not

34:34
she's not needy of relational resources except probably our family like real

34:40
real so so in that that sense I think yeah so you're thankful for her she's

34:46
she's so many of those other things that you're not yeah I agree yep yes Absol I

34:52
agree Megan is the things you're not the stable environments is just I

34:57
mean a perfect compliment to you know what I am was could have been okay like

35:04
she has been a rock in my life since I met her like literally the minute I met

35:09
her it was a stabilizing force in my kind of very unstable yeah you know life

35:16
and situation so yeah that yes absolutely yeah you're going to contact

35:21
mik after this and you're going to say hey this is a this is a couple's thing here we can start connecting you know

35:26
ones and ones and twos belong with sevens as far as we could start a speed dating service for you

35:34
exactly do like the auction like are you one can I get a one can I get a one I got a seven over here looking for a one

35:41
looking for a one yes I hear you I know it's like uh what's that game pit oh

35:47
yeah yeah yeah yeah yep three three three three three I got three I got

35:53
barley but that being said we're going to shift back to the seven questions

35:59
guess we should all right you got three question three am I loved the q3s are

36:05
gifted at loving and caring for others and they create safe loving environments for others to feel seen heard and

36:13
treasured at their core they crave being loved and the thought of being dismissed

36:19
unheard or unseen is a deep fear when q3s are at their best they're nurturing

36:25
kind empathetic however when they're in their scramble they tend to become peop

36:30
Pleasers overg give and engage in codependent

36:36
behaviors so yeah which part popped out to you there I I realized that codependent behaviors is a is

36:43
a yeah CR thing CR thing I didn't know whether you had a specific thought there or not

36:51
um I mean there was a person that popped into my mind I bet for all the good things that are in there but then again

36:57
with some of the bad things like I don't yeah can't say I've ever seen that in this person get um but yeah what about

37:05
you no it was just not that we're going to go naming names for all of these no we're not but actually I'm just going to

37:10
say Megan's all of these so okay she's the best all the good qualities yes

37:16
she's all the good none of the bad so but yes that um the the initial part and

37:22
and I like how you once you kind of read out the rest of it it makes sense

37:29
because at first that first read it can kind of be close to what's one how can I discern the difference am I loved but I

37:36
think that ability to be heard and seen and treasured yeah that makes sense

37:43
in my ability to feel loved you know is based on do you hear what I say yeah you

37:50
know am I valuable you know that kind of thing and I and I and once you look at

37:56
it from that context I can understand how yeah is it love you know and I yeah

38:01
there's definitely people that come to mind for me even in that process you know when it comes to the the thought of

38:07
being dismissed or unheard is a deep fear yeah you know and I can understand

38:13
that how that puts people in a scramble when it seems like I'm saying something

38:20
but it doesn't matter yeah it doesn't change anything MH you know and and yeah

38:26
I could understand understand how you know that can happen just in the aspect well there

38:32
again finances you know I'm saying this and this and this and we you know need

38:37
to cut back on our spending and you just bought that you know yeah I can

38:43
understand how that creates a a rupture yeah in that conflict between who we

38:49
are yeah especially you know if I'm if I'm looking at that uh and this reminds

38:55
me again I know we've talked about this before the money languages you know if I'm trying to create security by being

39:03
analytical saving and you're trying to you know promote success by buying these

39:10
things that make us look successful you can understand how that's going to create some disconnect conflict yeah no

39:17
doubt yeah but anything more on question three um

39:32
no I'm trying to decide if I want to say this but I'm going to say it because this the pause was long enough got make

39:40
we got to explain what that pause was about at this point uh my thought was that one feels

39:46
weak to me and then I thought that thought of mine probably has a lot to do with who I

39:53
am and the question you know like and I I imagine

39:59
whichever quadrant you're in looking at out at the other ones you're going to say that one seems wrong for these you

40:05
know I mean sure of course sure but that one of of all of them feels very like

40:10
weak and I would not want to be in that quadrant does that make sense no I hear

40:16
you and I but I but I know I'm I know my vision of it's incorrect in the sense

40:22
that if someone is loving they're they're gaining the benefits of being a loving person which I clearly miss out

40:28
on no I hear does that make sense yeah it makes sense and I think in some ways

40:33
um I I like that uh word use of the word codependent you know what I mean I think

40:39
that can have that perspective that you know I just I'm just not comfortable

40:45
standing on my own yeah I want someone else who's basically able to I can kind

40:51
of align with that person yeah so yeah just I think about it in that context of

40:57
you know it makes sense when I'm looking for that validation if you will yeah and

41:04
even if I'm even if feeling what you're feeling gives me that validation that's

41:09
an important thing yeah so yeah that's what how I was thinking about it from

41:14
the codependent part and recognizing all of these have their pros and cons just like anything yeah yeah yep I guess

41:22
that's kind of my My Confession is that it's hard for me to see much for pros

41:28
and see versus seeing a lot for negatives in that one yeah but again I

41:34
recognize that's pretty squarely coming from the quadrant I sit in so and yet we

41:40
we'd probably be able to say if the right person dismissed you and made you

41:46
feel unheard and yeah you're no no Justin that doesn't matter right right

41:51
right forget it move on yeah you you would definitely likely have a little

41:56
more reactivity to that depending on the person yeah

42:02
yeah yeah and yeah in fact yes definitely have struggled with that in

42:08
the past of like being having a conversation and feeling like we never had it yes like how dides how is this

42:14
feel this way yeah yes exactly so yeah I can definitely relate to that no doubt I guess that's kind of my point like I see

42:20
some of the negative stuff and even can reflect on it and see you know versus the positive I can't really relate to it

42:28
I hear I think that's probably why it feels I got yeah yeah you see primarily negative with that specific question

42:36
because I I think because I can relate to the negative Y versus I don't I can't you know relate to the POS I'm not

42:43
effervescent in my love if that makes sense like sure so yeah it's anyway

42:49
question four question four am I wanted the q4s are welcoming

42:56
accepting and incl inclusive and they're excellent at connecting people and including them at their core they crave

43:02
being wanted and the thought of being excluded replaced or shunned is a deep

43:07
fear when q4s are uh at their best there're strong in Social settings good

43:13
with people and make others feel special however when they're in their scramble they tend to lose themselves in the need

43:19
to feel wanted themselves mhm yep

43:25
yeah yeah and another one I can relate to the the negative more than a positive

43:31
sure yeah okay yeah yeah and I think it's interesting to when we you know

43:36
describe that difference I like the I like the subtle differences you know

43:41
because there is a difference you know between being wanted in my presence you

43:47
know I want you in my presence I want you know your value versus valued which

43:52
is the loved part yeah you know and I just it's it's hm it's not something

43:58
that I would routinely think about but reading through this I can understand those subtle differences the nuances

44:05
yeah because you know it's it's it's kind of funny when I think about it I there's

44:12
um um I forget the theory that it comes out of um it begins with an S but either

44:19
way there's there's a a worksheet that I'll sometimes use um because there's

44:25
when we grow up there's differ is between violations of love and violations of

44:31
trust in other words love has to do with those valuing and you know Dynamics when

44:38
I wasn't valued but trust has more to do with the structure and the disciplines

44:46
and the routines you know and you know we think of that and we can you'll hear those two words in love and trust and

44:53
it's like H they can almost be synonymous in some ways but yet when you break them out in a little bit and

44:59
that's what I appreciate about this yeah there's a difference between being valued and yet still being wanted you

45:06
know what I do with your heart versus what you are to me in a presence you

45:13
know that I desire your presence versus how I handle your heart those are kind of two different things to me yeah well

45:21
in here and that that's kind of the part that pops out any other thoughts on question four other than another one

45:27
don't want yeah I mean those two really again they fall probably in the in the

45:33
Continuum maybe on the other side of where where I am maybe because they both just feel very needy without a lot of

45:39
benefit sure but again it would be interesting yeah it's it's kind of funny

45:45
to think about you know in that context of why what is it about those ones and

45:50
granted it's probably more the negative side of it that makes it almost seem repulsive to you personally yeah yeah

45:57
and I yeah yeah very interesting I I do think it

46:04
yeah yeah yeah I'm sure we could spend plenty of time breaking down the repulsion because I think I think

46:10
there's there's some stuff to that but but yeah it it is interesting and I

46:15
think too if I could I can picture certain people fitting in both of these that are good people that I you know

46:22
sure but they don't like there's parts of it that I just lose it I'm like I

46:27
maybe not that person so if I could picture like the quintessential number question for person maybe it wouldn't

46:33
feel so reposs because i' be like oh like look at how this benefits their life and like I can see the value in

46:40
their life as a result of being that thing and I think I'm just not able to put the right face there to be able to

46:45
kind of get there so all I'm able to do instead is see the mirror yep and where I reflect in those things and it's only

46:52
the bad sure right so to your point about being dismissed like when I see that myself it's like H I don't want

46:59
everyone to struggle with him I loved am I wanted like cuz I do right like both

47:04
of them yep does that make sense it makes perfect sense and this is this is my this is my challenge to our audience

47:11
if you see yourself as a close friend of Justin and you take this assessment and

47:17
you come up with a three or a four don't tell him no make sure you tell him that

47:24
way he'll know it's like I would actually like to know a four yeah you know and this is yeah I I I could align

47:30
with four and you know we're good friends so so that's the reason there was a big pause is like do I really want

47:36
to say this because I don't want people who actually are that to think I think less of them I think it's more about

47:43
seeing myself in those things and going you get that away from me right yes it's more about self awareness it's like okay

47:51
what is it about that weakness that makes it seem uncomfortable for me yeah

47:57
yeah no I hear you is that fair oh yeah that's perfectly fair I appreciate you sharing in that yep I've worked very I I

48:04
think the thing is I've worked very hard to find a place where I feel loved and wanted MH exactly and so the idea of the

48:12
idea not being there not being where I am now where I've grown to is repulsive

48:19
to you to actually think so yeah I think that's a good breakdown of it no I just

48:25
it it would make perfect sense not saying that's the case we'd have to talk a little longer I would have to pay a lot more

48:32
money for that talk yes but no but it would be

48:38
interesting but either way so yes um number five my turn yes yeah fair enough

48:44
uh q5s are confident focused wait what's the question oh sorry thank you you're

48:50
welcome I had to I had to shift over to look around ask the question CU I was going to say yes Mark you are

48:57
but uh am I successful yes Mark you are sorry the QI are confident focused

49:06
and help everyone solve problems and win at their core they want to be and be

49:13
seen as successful and being seen as incompetent or underachieving is their

49:21
worst possible outcome when q5s are at their best they lead themselves and

49:26
others to positive outcomes and their can do attitudes give them the ability to produce great work however when

49:33
they're in their scramble they tend to lose sight of the bigger picture engage in workaholic behaviors and work towards

49:40
outcomes they may not really want so question question five that's question

49:46
five yes I have my own question question eight it's after the other one okay that's fair enough uh no it's not a

49:53
primal question it's a question about the Primal is this a Continuum like 1 through seven and it's a you know but

49:59
you get what I'm saying yeah because to me it makes sense that it is in the sense that if okay my perspective after

50:07
you read am I successful and as we're getting closer to seven the closer we get to Seven like as you go up backwards

50:14
from Seven the more you know I relate most to seven and then next most to six and next most to five or maybe I don't

50:21
know I haven't quite done the thoughts on it but definitely the Continuum get I get further from relating it till we get

50:28
to close to two and one where I'm like oh there's Megan the opposite right like that is that what this is I'm not I'm

50:36
not seeing it as a Continuum I would see it as multi-dimensional okay you know I

50:43
I would I would uh when I say that it's like

50:48
well what would what would be you know I guess value well when I think of trust

50:55
okay trust is multi-dimensional yeah it's not a Continuum of whether I trust

51:01
you or I don't trust you which would be a Continuum but I may trust you

51:08
with a personal information but I may not trust you with my finances MH you

51:14
follow me that's and so I don't necessarily see these as a Continuum I see them as you know spokes in a wheel

51:21
that they're multi-dimensional yeah or even like the anagram where you you may have a circle

51:28
but you know there's some connectors that you know kind of come across but I don't see it as a you know a line

51:35
Continuum that these are all on the same Dynamic but that's just my answer to

51:42
your question yeah but I will I will say there was a as I was reading five I it

51:48
was interesting to think about how closely that relates to the seven from

51:55
when I was reading it did you have any parts of you that was like that could be a little bit me in that

52:02
process uh like you yeah no you personally five six and seven okay I

52:09
feel very relating to at least the first sentence I you know I haven't read it all yet but so yeah so you and there's a

52:16
part of you that says okay I could have been a five6 or a seven as I really kind

52:22
of read it it happened to be that I'm a seven yeah and when we get to Seven I

52:27
have some thoughts about seven so I don't want to get spoil yet but yes I definitely feel like maybe on any given

52:34
day month or year in my life I I I would say three through seven okay I could

52:42
fall on sure and it's interesting uh in that uh that last part of five there

52:49
well actually it's in the first part and being uh seen as incompetent or underachieving as their worst outcome

52:56
yeah like that sounds very true of me I exactly it wasn't so much the what was

53:02
it it wasn't so much the underachieving but incompetent yeah it's like who wants

53:08
to be seen as incomp you know wait which one is that that's five that's still five yes that last part of that first

53:15
segment oh yeah yeah being seen yep yep yep yep yeah yeah like you're right like of course we're all gonna well not all I

53:23
mean no that's the interesting part of it cuz I'm you know not that that person is weak but it's like I could identify

53:30
with that person you know in that aspect of if they felt incompetent yeah and yet

53:35
uh there's a part of me that would basically say well there was still I may not do I can I can spin that from my own

53:44
I guess I'll call it maturity and recognize okay well I may I may just not

53:50
have learned that trade yet you follow trade in other words like

53:55
if I'm looking if I'm if someone is judging me as incompetent I I could still spin that to

54:03
say I mean think about it from the aspect I'm only incompetent

54:09
today yeah you know even from a podcast perspective I recognize you know compared to the to the gurus out there

54:17
you know it's like I haven't arrived you know from that and and so others might

54:22
view that it's like what the heck are you guys doing there still or you what you still doing there you know you just

54:28
haven't made it you know you have this many listeners but it's like that's where it can come back to a

54:34
seven for me because it does come back to well there's a purpose even if it affects just one y and my competency has

54:43
fact that we're both seven makes perfect sense that we do this podcast to the degree that we do it yes to the degree

54:49
that we do it with and not and that we're not if I would say if we were bent

54:55
more toward five successful we'd be done by now or or we would have worked a lot

55:03
harder by now to get you know what I mean like we would have done some of the

55:08
work necessary to become successful or given up like oh wow I what I'm saying and I think both of us are cont you got

55:14
to twist it just a little bit there huh you tell me I'm not working no I'm just joking yes I think because we're content

55:21
in the purpose aspect we can say that if one person gets something out of this

55:26
it's worth doing and that's enough for us no I hear and I think that's okay like that's that's how we're built and

55:33
that's okay and I think for that one person that we actually mean something to they also say I'm glad you're that

55:39
way because you know what I'm saying I do I do that's a great way to look at but I do think if we were bent towards

55:45
five we probably would you know look at the metrics look at do some research

55:51
some you know hire some people you know like there's stuff that can be done we

55:56
know that sure right yeah I think you know that a little more than I know that but yes I agree with you yeah yeah yeah

56:03
yeah but again if you were more five yeah no I hear you would know it too

56:10
sure sure we know it is sevens but if you were five it would be more important

56:16
yes yes it would it would bring on an urgency yes yeah to the point about you

56:22
don't know it as well as I do but if you are five you'd probably know it better than I did

56:28
from you know we're not successful cuz we're not doing what this person does and that thing does and what this article recommends yeah right exactly

56:35
yeah yeah so very interesting no doubt yeah any other thoughts on

56:40
five uh lend themselves and other positive

56:46
outcomes and they can their can do attitude gives them the ability to produce great work however when they're in their scramble they tend to lose

56:52
sight of the bigger picture engageing work call I mean I really yeah resemble a lot of like I I

56:58
uh resemble uh a workaholic uh what's the word I relate wow that word just disappeared

57:07
from the brain but it came back thank you you can identify with that yes I can identify with that one for sure yeah

57:12
both good and bad alcoholic loose side of the bigger picture work towards outcomes they may not really want all

57:19
three of those definitely can relate to yeah yeah again three through seven the

57:25
I can relate sure to those a lot and again three four really being scary

57:31
versions of relating no doubt and I don't like it you know and it's interesting I I I like the fact in some

57:37
ways we're doing this now as far as you know we talked about you know not being big on resolutions but still this

57:45
beginning of the year selfawareness you know just to be able to kind of read this and say okay yeah where am I at

57:52
what do what do what are my Tendencies yeah you know this is going to fit everybody perfectly but still being able

57:58
to say okay yeah I have some Tendencies towards this and how can I how can I grow in certain ways yeah of of these

58:06
you know I've already mentioned for me it's very much a Continuum one to seven like how I relate

58:12
to them um like the closer you get to Seven the more I relate how do you feel in terms of of these other ones which

58:19
ones do you say if I wasn't a seven I'd probably be that one like do you

58:25
have finish up six let's do it yeah your turn uh yes number six am I good enough

58:34
the q6s are valuable advocating and full of special abilities plus they're great at seeing possibilities in spotting

58:40
untapped resources at their core they want to be seen as good and ever being neg

58:47
and they want to see and ever being negatively thought of or criticize is a

58:53
hug a huge deal to them ever being negative thought over criticize is a huge deal to them when Q sixes are at

58:59
their best they add value to others Embrace their own imperfections and maximize the Val the lives around them

59:05
how however when they're in their scramble they tend to see themselves as a victim or shut down I feel like if I

59:13
didn't take the quiz and I just read these I'd probably pick that and I'm probably six I hear you so I'm glad the

59:20
quiz said I'm seven cuz I like seven better like so yeah I'm still waiting

59:25
until we de s to talk about my theory here other thing but yeah so am I good enough I definitely can relate to that

59:32
feeling and that fear sure especially the closer I get to the beginning of my

59:37
life if that makes sense going back in time yes yeah I gotcha all right I'm GNA

59:42
say my theory because I well let's finish up seven can we finish up seven yeah yeah uh Q7 do I have a purpose the

59:52
q7s are imaginative Forward Thinking and impactful and they consistently make the

59:58
world around them a better place at their core they want to live a life full

1:00:03
of meaning and living a purposeless life is the worst thing that could happen to

1:00:08
them when q7s are at their best they Embrace their boundless Visions rally

1:00:14
people towards a difference and help others unlock their purpose however when

1:00:19
they're in the scramble they tend to get caught up in finding the right path which can cause them to miss the good

1:00:27
it's good there you go now and the bad too like yeah yeah I

1:00:33
mean and it it's interesting and I'll I'll tell you before I go now you can

1:00:38
share your theory go ahead no I want to hear you go my theory will I'm I'm I'm

1:00:44
with you in the process when I read the descriptions and I and I

1:00:51
um I'm still thinking about your Continuum dynamic

1:00:57
but in other words I think what it comes down to for me is purpose trumps the

1:01:03
other equations you know it's like when I I'm with you when I read six you know

1:01:09
in other words what I do in my job you know it's it's about seeing people's

1:01:15
strengths and how I can you know utilize them in such a way that helps them see

1:01:22
what they could be yeah you follow me that's that that is definitely part of a

1:01:27
passion for me but even that recognizes when I look at it that way for me that

1:01:34
becomes part of my purpose because that tends to that's I guess it's a way I see

1:01:40
people that helps them find their purpose yeah and yeah I'll admit um I

1:01:46
don't necessarily I'm I'm thinking of our our

1:01:52
imaginative forward thinking that's I don't necessarily see myself as very

1:01:57
imaginative and I and I definitely have the the I might have a legacy mindedness

1:02:06
but I don't necessarily see myself as someone who is long-term

1:02:12
planning all aspects of my life you follow me yeah I I mean so in some ways

1:02:20
I am yeah I could I could waffle in that desp me that's a two what's a the so the

1:02:26
people who architect their future are more ones or two question from I think

1:02:33
the the fact that you have dreams about know Sparrow's rest and the pond and all

1:02:39
these kind of speaks to that I hear where you're coming from like you don't need to have the details you just and

1:02:45
that's probably and here again that might be where you you felt the love and

1:02:51
other parts feel icky to you oh you know that might the Forward Thinking I

1:02:57
recognize I'm not architecting the future yeah yeah I'm not an architect yeah that feels icky yeah you know it's

1:03:04
like if I have to have you know all the numbers that's that's why Chris is such a blessing to me you know she's a

1:03:10
numbers person you know and she says well where is this stand and you know and I can be that more

1:03:17
generalized okay this is what we'll do moving forward and yeah that's I I can I

1:03:23
can but there again when it I don't see myself as being very

1:03:30
imaginative you know and the forward thinking those two parts on that kind of said H I just don't see myself

1:03:38
necessarily there but I do recognize that I want what I do to matter yeah and

1:03:45
that's I think where what trumps that for me as a seven over the six yeah in

1:03:51
that Dynamic but I also just from my I see it don't agree with even your own

1:03:58
assessment that you're not imagin which again is how I see it you're not wrong

1:04:03
I'm just saying like Forward Thinking I think you are very uh what's the what's

1:04:09
the term I use for you calcul calculating calculating yeah uh in the

1:04:15
sense that you don't do something that doesn't matter right I got you yeah and

1:04:21
that's forward thinking like you take this opportunity in front of you and you look forward how will this I got you

1:04:27
impact my and your future sure is there an opportunity for purpose in it if not

1:04:34
you're like no yeah right or if so then you'll say how much how much purpose can

1:04:40
we sus out of this okay it's worth doing sure right I think that's very much

1:04:45
Forward Thinking and also you're maybe you're thinking imaginative as creative that's not just what I was going to say

1:04:51
it's being able to see a scenario in your mind imagine it and then imagine it as it could be to achieve

1:04:59
that yes and I think in order to pluck purpose out of others and see purpose you have to have that's that imagination

1:05:07
I gotta so I think you're thinking of Disney World and imagineering and creativity and I just I think they're

1:05:13
different I agree with you because and I and I fist pump yes indeed but yes I was

1:05:21
mixing up imaginative with creative yeah and I don't see myself as a creative

1:05:28
person but imaginative yeah I do think about I because I even in like sessions I will think about okay how can I help

1:05:36
this person see this differently and I start you know and that's where that's imagination and I'll I'll use narratives

1:05:43
a lot yeah to be able to say okay this is what that is feeling like and you

1:05:48
know it helps people yeah so I yeah yeah I don't NE imaginative means I'm and

1:05:55
from my perspective it's I'm willing to rethink how I think about it to help you understand it

1:06:03
better I mean I think that's pretty good definition of imagination right but

1:06:08
again I think we have a specific idea of imagination based on Disney World right like yeah yeah no no you exactly I was I

1:06:16
was as I was reflecting in that moment while you were sharing I'm in complete agreement with you you know imagination

1:06:25
and creativity can be two different things mhm yeah yeah so here's my theory

1:06:32
you ready for yeah I'm ready I feel like seven you're thinking that seven I'm

1:06:37
thinking thank you trying to think do I feel it yeah I think it's I'm thinking

1:06:43
seven is a privileged position oh and

1:06:48
Andor so depends on how you define privilege but I think

1:06:53
when I feel like I've climbed the ladder for from am I loved up to am I wanted up

1:06:59
to am I successful up to am I good enough and landed on do I have

1:07:05
purpose and I feel like I get to have this primal thing because the other

1:07:12
things are met I feel safe I feel secure whatever I I feel loved and I feel like

1:07:18
if you were to again go back in my life mhm I'd be in a different question you

1:07:25
know what I'm saying so you see this very similar to a hierarchy of needs not really because I because I don't think

1:07:32
someone who wants to feel safe is less like okay but but when you say from my perspective I'm saying from where I sit

1:07:39
I feel like I can say I'm at a seven now in my 40s I got you yeah but there's but

1:07:48
when you say privil here's why I say it's a theory there's a good chance I would have gotten that answer 20 years

1:07:54
ago too I'm not I guess I guess I'm saying I could be totally wrong but it

1:07:59
just feels like it's easy to say this is what we're going to have to review this in another 10 years yeah or go back 20

1:08:06
years can we do that no no no but yeah does that what what are your thoughts

1:08:11
about that I mean it's I recognize that it does put a

1:08:16
certain tint on the others and that they're less than and that's that's not my desire at all but I and I yeah I

1:08:26
here's here's where I'm at I think because we are at a seven it can

1:08:33
seem exactly like you're saying and yeah I'm going to recognize you know I have a

1:08:41
strong sense of value as do you for our wives yeah and I'm not saying they're

1:08:49
necessarily sixes and sevens right you know what I mean so from that

1:08:54
perspective yep I'm going to recognize no those we we

1:09:01
benefit from the other ones and twos and threes in in our Liv they almost free us

1:09:08
up to be able to be a seven sure right sure I guess again come back to that

1:09:15
privileged word uhhuh right like my life

1:09:20
has come to a certain point where I have the things in place to where I don't have to worry about those other needs I

1:09:27
got you I guess so therefore it frees me up to deal with my yeah you know my

1:09:33
natural fear or whatever do I have purpose but you're scramble yeah in other words when q7s are at their best

1:09:41
they Embrace their boundless Visions so those other ones and twos in your life

1:09:47
have allowed you to embrace what you want to be able to do yeah you follow me

1:09:53
Val and people help people towards add and help others in other words if you didn't have Megan in your life you

1:09:59
wouldn't be able to do that right quite like you can now in your 40s yep and unlock purpose however when they're in

1:10:06
their scramble they tend to get caught up in finding the right path which can

1:10:12
cause them to miss the good yeah you follow me yes and so I think you know

1:10:17
it's you're at a you're at a less scrambled part of life as a seven yeah

1:10:25
yeah because of the ones and twos around you yeah just kind of a interesting way

1:10:32
to think about it yeah yeah because I think you know so often and I and I think you'd agree with this you know so

1:10:39
often early on in relationship you know it is that difference that tends to create the

1:10:46
conflict why don't you why don't you just let me do my thing you know yeah but you know because your thing is

1:10:53
counter to my thing yeah you know but as we learn in relationship that no our our

1:11:00
things can be coexist and be compliment synergistic sure then we're able to be

1:11:08
you know that yeah a fuller sense of answering that question so yeah so I

1:11:16
also recognize too it w from the very beginning I was saying I think my perspective is very squarely centered in

1:11:23
the quad this quadrant of do I have purpose looking out at the other ones I'm only seeing it through that perspective and even looking at this one

1:11:29
it's like I see this one from this perspective is like this is the best one

1:11:35
I imagine that ones probably feel that's the best one and two and you know what I'm saying no doubt and they would say

1:11:42
like for instance am I loved and do I love you know like at their best they're very loving and effusive and they would

1:11:47
say the greatest Commandments love God and people so I got it right sure right maybe I don't know I'm not them but I

1:11:53
can see how looking out from any of those other ones you could yeah have the same uh yeah perspective and it's

1:12:02
interesting as we come back to self-awareness and others awareness how

1:12:09
the you know ones and twos have that empathetic perspective and I think you

1:12:16
know that's where you know as you described it it's like as I understand I'm a seven my ability to value value

1:12:24
and be empathetic about ones and twos can actually grow yeah whereas you

1:12:31
know or even where threes or fours are concerned once I understand what they

1:12:36
contribute it's like they do it in a way that's not repulsive to me you know but as from my

1:12:44
seven that feels like a spot that's icky I don't want to go there you know I

1:12:49
start feeling reactive about that but they're very comfortable right there and

1:12:55
I need those people in my lives to help me better fulfill my seven yeah you know

1:13:00
what's interesting about what you just said May me think about the scrambling as a seven is tending to get caught up

1:13:06
in finding the right path which can cause them to miss the good and I feel like those things that feel icky about

1:13:12
those other ones I think are when I'm scrambling to find the right path and is it is it being wanted and I'm you know

1:13:19
spinning my wheels about trying to feel wanted and it doesn't work sure am I loved and I'm spinning my my wheels it

1:13:25
doesn't work am I successful all right let's chase that spinning my wheels and it doesn't work right yeah so so that I

1:13:31
think some of those things I feel icky are probably because I'm scrambling as a seven I would agree interesting yeah

1:13:39
interesting interesting no doubt so yeah that's a yeah so feel free to take the

1:13:46
assessment you know know that know that this isn't coton Stone type thing and you know it's just a desire to you know

1:13:55
share a little bit of a an Insight a fun little assessment and just you know grow

1:14:00
in a grow in a self-awareness type thing it's been uh it's been fun to have the

1:14:05
discussion as far as you know um that others awareness and go ahead well I was going

1:14:12
to say one of the things I like about this particular assessment is that we fit it all on one Google doc and we can

1:14:18
look at it here sure not a lot of the assessments are that uh succinct sure uh

1:14:24
so the reason I say can we share that we can share this right I mean I me I'd rather share his web page yeah that's

1:14:30
true too yeah give him the credit but because it's all on his page too but um

1:14:35
uh but but the point is read all of them sure and try you know don't just learn

1:14:40
about yourself take the quiz you know figure out what you are but then you know read up on the other ones cuz yeah that's knowing who you are is only half

1:14:48
the equation and I think in some ways and granted maybe a little spoiler alert type thing I would take the assessment

1:14:54
before before I even read the questions yeah I agree because otherwise you're going to kind heard this exactly ideally

1:15:02
before you heard this episode but yeah but yeah all things being equal yeah I

1:15:07
agree take the assessment first good point because yeah I don't uh and also I didn't know this during the first third

1:15:14
of the questions but you can slide the slider between all the way to the left and like it's AUM like Mark was saying I

1:15:20
was going all the way I thought I thought it was one of those binary ones but yeah you can put it right wherever

1:15:27
you want you can leave it right in the middle which I also figured out and did a few times oh did you okay yeah very

1:15:32
feel neutral about no I I like you say I move the slider every time but not far at sometimes yeah exactly yeah yeah but

1:15:42
so no we we uh maybe we should just record a segment after this that says

1:15:48
when you listen to this podcast please go to and take this but either way you get the idea yeah it's been fun just

1:15:55
that right now said who listens to a podcast from the

1:16:00
back Oh you mean stick it at the front yeah all right I'm not saying we have to

1:16:06
but say it right now and I'll I'll put it at the front podcast listeners please take a

1:16:12
moment to go to the Mike Fosters seven seven Primal questions assessment

1:16:19
assessment and then listen to the rest of the podcast you you'll thank us if you do that and that order you can go to

1:16:27
primal.com uh yeah that's probably the best place to go yeah nice job I'm going to put that at the front and I'm also

1:16:33
going to leave it at the end so everyone can that's right that's fair enough they'll know they'll know I wasn't very for thinking on that part that's right

1:16:41
but at the beginning they like wow they were very forward

1:16:46
thinking so that's how we see [Music]

1:16:52
it hey thank you for listening to our podcast if you like how I see it please

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do all the things that podcasts tell you to do subscribe rate review follow us uh

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1:17:12
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1:17:23
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1:17:29
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